Have you been having thoughts about ending your life? Perhaps these thoughts frighten you, leaving you feeling ashamed and unable to tell anyone what's going through your mind. Maybe you're wondering if you're going mad or feeling guilty about having such thoughts when others care about you. As a counsellor working with people online and from my practice in West London, Oxford and Cheltenham, I want you to know that having suicidal thoughts doesn't make you weak, selfish, or broken, it makes you human in pain.
Understanding These Frightening Thoughts
Suicidal thoughts are your mind's way of saying the emotional pain feels unbearable. They're not necessarily about wanting to die, they're about wanting the suffering to stop. Your brain, overwhelmed by distress, seeks an escape route from feelings that seem impossible to endure.
These thoughts might arrive suddenly. Intrusive. Persistent. They can feel foreign, as if they're not truly yours. Sometimes they whisper quietly; other times they scream. The intensity can be terrifying, leaving you questioning your own mind.
The Shame and Isolation
Suicidal thoughts often bring crushing shame. You might worry that speaking about them will frighten loved ones, result in hospitalisation, or confirm that you're "crazy." This shame creates dangerous isolation precisely when connection is most crucial.
Society's discomfort with suicide makes these feelings worse. Well-meaning people might say things like "you have so much to live for" without understanding that depression has temporarily stolen your ability to feel hope or connection to those reasons.
Breaking the Silence
Talking about suicidal thoughts doesn't increase suicide risk, it often reduces it. When you voice these thoughts, they lose some power. The darkness becomes less consuming when shared with someone who can sit with your pain without judgement.
Not everyone needs to know. Choose trusted individuals like your friends, family, and colleagues, those who can listen without trying to immediately "fix" you.
Immediate Coping Strategies
When thoughts feel overwhelming, focus on the next few hours rather than forever. Take small actions: drink water, contact someone, engage your senses. Create physical distance between yourself and any means of harm.
Remember that feelings, however intense, are temporary. This moment of unbearable pain will shift, even if you can't imagine how.
Finding Professional Support
If you're having suicidal thoughts, professional support is crucial. These thoughts are treatable symptoms, not character flaws. Counselling provides a safe space to explore what's driving these feelings and develop coping strategies.
If you're struggling with suicidal thoughts, please reach out to Hope and Harmony immediately. Together, we can work through these overwhelming feelings and help you find reasons to stay. You matter, your life has value, and support is available. You don't have to face this darkness alone.