Have you ever felt oddly detached or 'unreal' while grieving? As if you're watching your life from afar, or the world around you has become dreamlike? If so, you might be experiencing dissociation, a common but often misunderstood aspect of grief. As a counsellor working with people online and from my practice in West London, I've seen how dissociation can complicate the grieving process for many individuals.

Understanding Dissociation in Grief

Dissociation is a mental process where a person disconnects from their thoughts, feelings, memories, or sense of identity. In the context of grief, it often serves as a protective mechanism, shielding us from overwhelming emotions or traumatic memories associated with our loss.

Common experiences of dissociation in grief include:

• Feeling emotionally numb or empty
• A sense that your surroundings are unreal or unfamiliar
• Difficulty remembering details about your loved one or the loss
• Feeling disconnected from your body or as if you're observing yourself from outside

While these experiences can be unsettling, they're often a normal response to the intense emotions of grief.

The Impact on the Grieving Process

While dissociation can provide temporary relief from painful emotions, it can also hinder the processing of grief if it persists. You might find it difficult to engage with your feelings about the loss or to participate fully in life. Over time, this can lead to a sense of being 'stuck' in your grief.

Coping Strategies

If you're experiencing dissociation, there are several strategies that can help:

Grounding techniques: Focus on your senses to reconnect with the present moment. Notice five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste.

Mindfulness practices: Regular meditation or mindful breathing can help you stay present and connected to your body and emotions.

Journaling: Writing about your experiences can help process emotions and create a sense of continuity in your memories.

Seeking support: Sharing your experiences with trusted friends, family, or a support group can help you feel less alone and more connected.

When to Seek Professional Help

While some degree of dissociation can be normal in grief, persistent or severe symptoms may require professional support. If you find that dissociation is interfering with your daily life, relationships, or ability to process your grief, it may be time to seek help from a counsellor.

At Hope and Harmony, I offer a safe, understanding space to explore your experiences of grief and dissociation. Together, we can work on strategies to help you stay present, process your emotions, and move forward in your grief journey.

Remember, there's no 'right' way to grieve, and experiences like dissociation are more common than you might think. If you're struggling with dissociation in your grief, don't hesitate to reach out. You don't have to navigate this challenging time alone.